New Jersey State Slogans (We ain’t perfect togetha!)

Ericles — Mon, 14 Nov 2005 05:26:43 +0000

So… “Acting Governor” Richard Codey decided that “New Jersey & You, Perfect Together” was getting stale. We needed a new slogan and the best that a quarter of a million dollars paid to an marketing firm could belch up was “New Jersey, we’ll win you over”.

So Codey sent out a plea to the huddled masses (with long distance & an internet connection) for a new state slogan. They came up with some winners! Here’s a few of my favorites gleaned from the internet:

New Jersey: You Gotta Problem Wit Dat?
Welcome to New Jersey. Expect Delays.
NJ: Sold to Corzine.
New Jersey – It’s not as bad as it smells!
New Jersey: Come Glow With Us.
NJ: The Traffic Will Kill You. Have a Nice Day.
NJ: Toxic Waste for all!
Welcome to the Garden State. Become our fertilizer.

I was pretty sure I could do better, so I came up with not just some slogans, but a mascot & limerick as well.

New Jersey – A Developers Dream!
NJ: You could have it all. My empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt.
NJ: Fuckin’ Gulf Stream, Yo!
New Jersey – The Rental State
NJ Drivin’ – The Horns of Plenty
New Joisey – where New Yorkas go ta die.
NJ: What? You gunna drive all the way to Maryland?

New Mascot:
Elizabeth, The Toll’s Belle for thee!(See right) She’s from the NJ state flag, Ai, so she is. Notice the toll taking hand and the reminder of the horns of plenty. Her hair is also big, which I think is generally representative of the state.
I didn’t retouch anything else! The groucho mustache is authentic! Don’t believe me, check here.

Limerick:
Hey! Move to N.J. like a Chump!
Breathe our air! Develop a lump!
Tap water? Stomach pumper!
Our roads? Bumper-to-bumper!
New Jersey – New York’s Garbage Dump!

Elizabeth
The new mascot of the state of New Jersey!

There you have it folks. Don’t thank me now, wait until “horns of plenty” is on your licence plate!

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New Jersey State Slogans (We ain’t perfect togetha!)