I think at about this time of life it’s high time to stop celebrating getting older. We’re just celebrating getting closer to dead! If people insist on celebrating the life of another, don’t do it on a birthday – I’d rather ya’ll call it something else….

So!

Tomorrow, my first Annually Recurrent Life Acknowledgment Day will take place. Henceforth to be known as ARLAD. Or, for the ironic twist, just LAD for short.

If a day is too long (or too short), I’ll also gladly accept a Continually Recurring Affirmation Period if you can put with that C.R.A.P.

Better yet, lets toss out that whole concept of age per annum all together. I firmly believe that the only people who are counting the days until their next aging are those who are 20 and 61 (or 65 if they want Full Benefits). For the rest of us, I propose we “age” in a manner that meshes better with society. Therefore, I state for the record that am currently 3 Jobs old.

Don’t get me wrong… I don’t want to destroy the balloon & party favors industry… I just want to forget how bloody old I’ll be tomorrow at 5:59 PM… Is that too much to ask?

So, it’s up to you to Help Me Forget!